Another year has begun, and I've not mentioned it here, two thirds of a month in. I tend to become retrospective in January. I realize most people do this at the end of a year, rather than the beginning.
"A change in the wind, says I," - yes, that is how I feel, as though great changes were headed into our lives. I know why. There has been a lot of change, with more to come. We have a large kitten, (named Siouxsie, we did finally name her, and she is a bit of a banshee), and our dog Diablo has heart disease and cancer. We are looking at land, more seriously. My man is employed! There is a home with hot running water, a dishwasher, and more than 240 sq. ft. on the horizon, perhaps within three months. I am in my second semester of school. My job is progressing, I am learning new things in my field every day. I can see how eventually, all this effort will pay off. I hope.
I feel overwhelmed by all we have yet to accomplish, but that the "we" is stronger. I am encouraged by what our effort has produced thus far. I have not given up, and my hope has been strengthened. I have a roof, with hope of a better one. I have food, even good food. I have fresh running water, and if we have to heat it the old fashioned way right now, it teaches patience and water conservation, and when we get in a new place, running hot water will feel like an extreme, pampering luxury. I will have room to work! I can pull out and fire up the forge. Maybe set up a spinning wheel. I want to learn how to play the piano, too.
School seems to be one of those things that will feel like it takes forever, but will be gone before I know it. In ten years, if it all comes together, I'll be a papered engineer, with a couple patents under her belt, living in a hand built earthen dome home on desert acreage, with a man using his computer science major and the business he has built. We'll be able to travel, able to be comfortable, and able to pursue those activities we choose. I will have become the blacksmith/bladesmith I have wanted to become for years. Perhaps by then I will have that novel published, with one or two more behind it.
I have filled my time with "impossible goals", not that the individual dreams are impossible, but that they could all happen together. "Accomplishing the impossible, one day at a time," that's my mantra these days, because, it isn't impossible. It's simply improbable. For me, that's a piece of cake! Right? Right.
I wonder, can confidence and sheer willpower pull it off? Sure. I think... anyway, that's what I have to work with, right now, so it will simply have to be enough.
Yeah, it'll work.
